Top 5 Ways to Make Money Online (For Noobies)



We all wanna make it big,

We all wanna

- Get Money, Get Paid -




Making money online has never been easier.
Mr Stingy shows you how to cash in BIG using YouTube, Blogger, and even Facebook!





Check out the Top 5 Ways to Make Money Online

Top 5 Ways to Make Money from Home (For Noobies) #6


6. Facebook



I was conflicted about whether ot not to add this particular item to my list. That's why its number six of five, LOL. There has been alot of skepticism lately about whether or not Facebook is a profitable venue for everyday Joes like you and I. No doubt, companies with enough capital definitely make profit from their advertising, but can folks like us make money with Facebook?

This guy seems to think so: http://www.virtualmarketingblog.com/make-money-with-facebook/. However, I somewhat disagree. This guy seems to be writing under the assumption that you and I have tons and tons of capital to start off with! FOL.

Here's an easier (by that I mean cheaper) way to make money using Facebook. Instead of relying on Facebook for AdSense money, USE Facebook as a promotion tool.

Here are some very basic guidelines that you can follow to use Facebook to make money.

1. Create a blog. This will be your primary source of income. Use blog publishing systems such as Blogger, WordPress or TypePad. I use Blogger because I find that it's simplicity is the most manageable. Also, you have many options and features to enhance your blog, such as Add-Ons, Gadgets, Webmaster Tools, Feedburner and Google Analytics. It's my favorite publishing system, and I can't really reccommend any other.

2. Sign up for Google AdSense. AdSense puts advertisements on your blog, and everytime someone clicks them, you'll get some money. Typically, it's around 7 cents to 3 dollars PER ad click. Imagine how much money you'd be able to make with lots of traffic.

2. Use Facebook as a promotion tool. Make a Facebook account, or use your existing one - tell people to visit your site! Notify your friends of updates and new material, get more traffic. Add more friends! Make a Facebook group, spread the word! Get it out there!
Basically, the more traffic you get, the higher the chances are of getting ad-clicks. And that's how you're gonna make that money.

Chyeah!

Well that's it for now, but I'll keep coming back with more ways to monetize the internet! It takes a lil' while because I have to try it out and assess my results/findings.

Thanks a ton everyone,

Peace!

Mr. Stingy, ALL DAY.

Top 5 Ways to Get Rich From Home (for Noobies) #5


5. Share Online Art Work


Now, we all know that artists struggle to make a living. Yeah, it's hard, and artists are usually not even appreciated in their own time! Look at Van Gough, Emily Carr, and Pablo Picasso. But times are changing, and if you're a talented artist, you can hit it big online!

One very notable example is the Pon and Zi collection by Jeff Thomas. I'm sure you've seen these characters around somewhere...

These two have blown up all over the internet. And I'm willing to bet that Jeff Thomas, the creator, has cashed in big on these critters.

His website, http://www.ponandzi.com/, has Ads by Google (AdSense) and he has strategically organized his website so that one picture is viewed at a time. Genius.

This way he increases his traffic as more people click through his site to see his art. I'm a fan, of his art, and his monetizing strategies. Bravo. Well played.



Your Odds at Making Money - 1:8

If you have the talent, and great promotion strategies, then you should be set. Since Pon and Zi, thousands of artists have been trying to gain exposure through the internet. With that said, your art needs to stand out and shine, and nothing does that better than passion and skill. Amirite?

Alright, this concludes my lil' report here. Or does it? =O
I'll be back real quick with an extension/edit to this list - I'm currently experimenting with a few other ventures and I'll let you know how that works out!

So, so long for now, and peace out!

Mr. Stingy. All day.

Top 5 Ways to Get Rich From Home (for Noobies) #4


4. Video Hosting


There are many legal issues concerning online video hosting, but that doesn't stop it from being a hotbed for revenue! Hosting videos, or, uploading videos so that they can be viewed on your website, is extremely profitable for one simple reason - traffic. Because of copyright infringement issues, YouTube has taken down lots of material that has been illegally uploaded without the consent of the owner/distributor. Television shows and series such as Family Guy, the Simpsons, Naruto and Bleach, were able to be viewed on Youtube until she took them down.
But, people still want to watch. But where? Now, special video hosting sites have popped up all over the place, usually only hosting one particular show/genre. Many of these sites are short lived, but are able to generate lots and lots of profit. Such sites are usually not heavily promoted because they don't need to be (or can afford to be; legal action would probably take place and the site would be shut down). A simple domain name, and good bandwidth to stream online videos clearly is all it takes to get lots of traffic and viewer loyalty.

Take Kumby.com for example. This website streams Anime series online. Hundreds of thousands of people visit this site every day, undoubtedly throwing AdSense revenues through the roof!
This is a much riskier venture because legal action/persecution is a constant stalker. Many of this sites are short lived and are used to cash in, and cash in big.

This is a standard template of most video hosting sites. The idea is simple: maximize the chances of ad-clicks.

With more ads presented on the page, the chances are higher that someone will see something of interest and click on it. *Note* "Ad blindness" or when people ignore ads, does not occur too frequently with this kind of template, in my experience. The moving images present too many visual stimulants; the viewer's attention darts around and cannot ignore the myriad of ads on the periphery of focus.

Because a these types of video hosting websites cater more towards younger audiences, AdSense will appropriately insert ads relevant to their demographic. (Dont ask how, the AdSense Bot was made by a team of super geniuses) Video hosting websites attract much larger crowds.

In my experience, I've found out that the banner ads of the left hand side of the page earns the most money, while ads on the top of the page generate the least. Nonetheless, experiment and observe your earnings! (Google Analytics presents information regarding visitor activity, this feature is free for Google AdSense)

Well, uploading videos online without the permission of the owner and or distribution is illegal. I've witnessed a pattern in the way these video hosting websites work. So here it is:

1. A simple/catchy yet informative name is found
2. The site is set up quickly, with only a few videos uploaded (usually trailers)
3. The Google AdSense bot crawls it and puts on Ads
4. Videos are uploaded like mad; the site is heavily promoted on forums/blogs/facebook
5. Lots of traffic come in - lots of AdSense revenue
6. Shut it down. Cash out.


Your Odds at Making Money - 1:3

Video Hosting television shows without the distributor's permission is technically illegal. I do not condone this behavior/view/attitude. This section is strictly for informative/educational purposes. But hey, if I was doing it, this is how I'd get it done.

I don't advise going into video hosting television shows. And if you did, it probably would not be a good idea to promote your site on blog catalogs that monitor and report this type of thing. Instead, promotion tools such as FaceBook and MySpace would be better...

Cashing in with Google AdSense is easy. Costs you nothing to sign up, and every ad click earns you money. Video hosting brings in a ton of traffic, thus improving your chances of ad-clicks. Video Hosting, I surmise, probably generates the most money. Riskiest? Yeah. Should you do it? Probably not...
Cheers ;)

Examples




Top 5 Ways to Get Rich From Home (for Noobies) #3


3. Product Review


Okay, so this particular item on the docket ties in very well to YouTube videos and Blogging. Product reviews are great. Why? Because it's opinionated, open for debate, and attracts expensive ads, especially reviews of cars, movies, music and collectable merchandise. And if you have a really solid/wacky/contraversial review, you're guarenteed to get traffic! People are always looking for someone to argue with and tr0ll.


Want to hear an amazing true story? On YouTube, a guy who goes by the alias Praune2Forever gained online infamy for delivering brutally honest reviews on movies and music. His picture is on the left.

His witty and brutal revies attract hundreds of thousands of viewers, and as I might guess, probably earns him quite a bit! His original style, uniqueness and consistency have secured a solid position as one of YouTube's funniest and nastiest personalities. Visit his YouTube User page for more of his videos.

So, one day, Praune2Forever posted a video giving his thoughts on 50 Cent's latest business ventures into the Adult entertainment business. More specifically - a 50 Cent shaped dildo. Praune delivered a brutal review, questioning 50 Cent's credibility and character, calling him a "media WHORE!" This video attracted 928,268 viewers (August 2009).

Now for the remarkable part. Somewhere out there, 50 cent was just looking around on YouTube, and saw Praune's video. His feelings? I'm thinking that 50 Cent felt pretty curious and wanted to capitalize on this video. So 50 Cent contacted Praune2Forever and flew him out to New York City to do a YouTube video together, also hosted on Thisis50.com

If you haven't seen this video yet, watch it. Please. LOL!




Your Odds of Making Money - 1:2

Again, with Google AdSense, money is extraordinarily easy to make. So long as someone clicks on your ads, you'll earn some money. The more people who click on them, the more money you'll get! Easy as pie. The odds here are one in two because I'm going to factor in chance. Perhaps you don't want to promote your videos/blogs to your friends, and just push it out there using indexing tools such as Technorati. With 94.1 million blog readers in the United States, and 80,600,000 monthly visitors on YouTube alone (not including Veoh.com, Dailymotion.com), I'd say your chances are pretty good that someone out there will notice you. Cheers ;)

Examples

Because product review blogs are opinion-oriented, there is no one concrete system/format to follow. But here's an excellent guide on how to create a product review blog.
Follow this link to http://www.profitblogger.com/



Top 5 Ways to Get Rich from Home (#2)


2. Create YouTube Videos



Yes! What's better than the written word? Moving pictures with sound. YouTube, owned by Google, has given its users the option of monetizing their videos. According to ebizmba.com, in the US alone, YouTube receives 80,600,000 monthly visitors. Not monetizing your videos would be foolish, wouldn't it?
Google offers AdSense for videos. AdSense, which is free, opens the opportunity for you to make money! With YouTube, it takes off the stress of promoting yourself because there is only one place to look - YouTube!

*Update* Google has a "Featured Videos" component where you can pay to promote your videos on YouTube. This gives you great exposure, which means more views, meaning (almost 100% of the time) more ad-clicks.











Everytime someone clicks this ad, the WineKone earns some money.




Oh by the way, watch his videos, they're hilarious. Click here. Or visit his YouTube Account page at http://www.youtube.com/user/thewinekone.


Your Odds at Making Money - 1:2

The odds are actually better than this. With so many visitors, (80,600,000 monthly visitors as of August 2009) the chances that someone will stumble across your video is pretty good when you factor in human intervention and don't just leave it to chance. Tell your friends to watch your videos, leave the link open on a library computer, be creative! The total number of videos currently on YouTube is unknown; thousands of videos are added each day. But all it takes for you to earn money is for a few people to click the advertisements on your videos. Will you get rich? Well, it depends on how many views you'll get, which in turn depends on how great/funny/cute/gross your video is. Please folks, original material!


Some Great Material



------------------Email me to add your video!----------------------

Top 5 Ways to Get Rich From Home (for Noobies) #1



1. Create a Web-log (Blog)


According to Technorati's 2008 State of the Blogosphere report, there are over 94.1 million blog readers in the United States alone. That's 50% of all internet users! (eMarketer - May 2008) Blogs are a "global phenomenon that has hit the mainstream," in fact, 4 out of the Top 10 Entertainment sites are blogs.

The Blogosphere, an intricate community of blogs, is an incredibly profitable venue for entrepreneurs and business people everywhere, with endless opportunities for advertising and promotion. With the arrival of many blog publishing systems, it has become very easy for internet users to create their own blog. These publishing systems include WordPress, Blogger, Squarespace and Mephisto.

Making money off of blogs has become very easy and simple as well - most blogs generate revenue from Ad Clicks. Most blog publishing systems support Google AdSense. Google AdSense puts ads on your page, and everytime somebody clicks them, your blog will receive some money. Advertisements are almost always based on your page's content, and the quality of the ads (High paying vs. Low paying) is influenced by your content and usually determined by your blog's traffic levels. For example, a blog with more frequent visitors will have more expensive ads.

Signing up for Google AdSense is simple and free. So long as you have your own blog/webspace, you can apply for a Google AdSense affiliation. More information regarding Google AdSense can be located on their page, which you can access here. A major reason why blogging is so profitable is because it doesn't cost you anything besides your time and effort.
Technorati's 2008 State of the Blogosphere surveyed and reported Blog earnings.


What is your annual estimated revenue from advertising on your blog? Annual revenue from blog (US$)
MEAN annual revenue MEDIAN annual revenue MAXIMUM annual revenue
U.S. bloggers with advertising $5,060 $200 $350,000
European bloggers with advertising 9,040 200 324,000
Asian bloggers with advertising 7,440 120 250,000

For more, click here.

Your Odds of Making Money - 1:4


According to Technorati, one in four bloggers use advertising on their blogs. Basically, as long as you sign up for advertising programs (Google AdSense, Yahoo! Publisher) you will make money. The amount of money earned really depends on your traffic, which is up to you to generate. There are a multitude of good websites dedicated to helping you increase your traffic.

Here are the ones that I found most informative.



One crucial element of generating traffic is exposure. Exposure through blog listings, pings, blog catalogs and emailing lists can bring in crowds, thus increasing your chances at ad-clicks!

Here are some really good sources that you can use to push your blog out there.


Some Great Examples

These blogs here are truly excellent. Well, not that I like Perez Hilton or anything, but because these blogs have utilized tools and have gained lots and lots of exposure, thus increasing traffic levels and increasing their ad-click-through rate.

Some other great blogs are:

Problogger.net
Goodvibeblog.com
Thinkingoflaughing.com
BarackObama.com


Want your added to this list? Just e-mail me and we can get it done. :)

Tricks to Get Ad Clicks - Run a Successful Blog pt.3

As you may already be aware of, advertisers and marketers employ a myriad of techniques to captivate the attention of consumers and affirm interests. Whether it's sex appeal, wealth, greed, or belittlement, condescension and exclusivity, advertisers are quite ruthless, and making killings every single day.

Alright. So I'm working under the assumption that Mr. Stingy fans have integrity and a sure-fire moral compass. But you still want profits; you want people to click your ads!

So for this post, there are two keywords that I should define:

Click-Through-Rate (CTR) - This is the average rate of people who click on your ads.
Page Impressions - This is the total number of impressions, or clicks, on your site.

The normal CTR is about 4%. The average ad pays 30 cents. So, if you have 1000 page impressions, and 4% CTR, then you make about twelve bucks. Dang.

Obviously, you want to make MORE. And there are two ways to do that: increase traffic and increase CTR.

Well, for all you people out there who want to increase your traffic, don't expect your traffic to jump within a few months. It takes a long time to build a customer base.

However, increasing your CTR is pretty damn easy. Now, as long as you're not breaking Google AdSense policies, increasing your CTR is fair game, and is actually promoted by Google. Cheating Google AdSense would be dishonestly having your ads clicked.

So, how can you increase your CTR honestly, you ask? It's a pretty simple method that has existed for ages: visual attraction!

Positioning ads to increase visibility, as well as designing them to be aesthetically appealing will drastically increase your ad clicks. Relevancy is also crucial, but I'm assuming you have read the previous parts of this post; we go into it with more detail.

Google AdSense has run many case studies and tests, and ads that receive the most attention from customers are placed in the middle-left-hand-side. Also, ads that appear in the above half of the page receive plenty of attention as well.

Ads that blend into your blog's color theme seem more natural, and reverse the effects of Ad blindness - a condition in which people will ignore ads. Ad blindness is caused by contrasting colors, and bluntness. Be subtle, let your ads blend. Not only will this appeal to consumers, but it makes your blog look very professional.

Ad placement is an incredibly easy topic. Alot of people like to go into the nitty-gritty details. I find this terribly ineffective, because ad placement is very simple - blend your ads into your page. Contrary to what you might think, case studies, research and personal experience has proven that subtle and blended ads are very effective on the internet; ads that pop-up, or have too much razzle are readily ignored.

Blend your ads people. Increase that CTR. Content will boost traffic and page impressions.

Thanks a bunch, fellas.

Mr Stingy

Jack-Up Your Traffic Levels - Run a Successful Blog pt.2

Please read pt. 1 first. =)

I pride myself in being honest with my readers, and I'm sure you have noticed the completely out-of-whack ads that appear on my site. Lately, I've attracted "love" ads, and it's killing me here, really. So how did I get these ads if Google AdSense does a good job in posting relevant ads? My mistake. Two days ago, I wrote a post about mooching, and used a certain celebrity group as an example. Google AdSense then effectively crawled my site and flooded me with these ads which are irrelevant to my content. So! A lesson we can all learn from; be vigilant on what you write.

Alright, so today's post will be all about increasing your traffic levels. I am going to provide you with my methods, as well as some famous (and very rich) bloggers out there.

This post can be divided into three sections: exposure, content and "wow-factor."

Exposure:

Exposure. This is of the utmost importance - how can you get large amounts of traffic if no one knows about your blog? Enter: diffusion of information. There are many types of information spread, but the ones most relevant to popularizing your blog are: catalogs, invasion and word of mouth.

Catalogs

Catalogs are very important for giving your blog the necessary exposure. Putting your blog on a list enables readers to see your blog and click on them. However, as of 2009, blogging is becoming increasingly difficult as major companies hoard readers. It's very hard to compete with professional blogging agencies because they pump out 20 - 30 blogs a day. Obviously, their frequency attracts a large number of readers, and their blogs rank high. But, just being on the list gives you some exposure - a chance for readers to see your site.

Some of the best catalogs are: Technorati, BlogCatalog, Digg...the list goes on.
Use Ping-O-Matic to get your blog on 30+ links instantly!

Invasion

This technique is one of my personal favorites. It's a little dirty, but my Google Analytics program tells me that it works. In today's day and age, most people are turning away from blogging and towards popular media sites that are a little easier to digest. Sites such as YouTube, Facebook, and Twitter steal many readers. So, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. Take advantage of these services that propagating your site! "Invade" these sites with your domain name/catchphrase and instigate large amounts of people to visit your blog; YouTube has an audience in the millions, and redirecting the tiniest fraction of them will drastically increase your traffic levels!
Other places to, well, "spam", are forums, Facebook, MSN, Yahoo Messenger, Digg, Twitter. Basically, wherever there are people, that's where you should advertise.

Word of Mouth

This method is still effective, believe it or not. Having great content will prompt people to share your site with others. It creates customer loyalty. It brings repeat customers. It's a great way to popularize your site. However, it should be used in accordance with the previously listed methods for maximum effect.


Content:

What's going to bring customers back? What's going to dig you a niche? What's going to establish a customer base? Content. Great content.
What all bloggers should remember is that you get back whatever you put into it.
Having really good content that appeals to people is what's going to get you customers.
I will elaborate on this more tomorrow, because it takes a whole article to really get across how important content is. Also, tomorrow I bring more devious methods to the table: how to convince your reader (through your content) to click your blogs and come back, over and over again. As well as topics that are the most profitable!


WOW Factor:

Shock-value. This usually has to do with appearance and aesthetics, but with blogs it has to do with your style. Put yourself into your writing; put your personality, demeanor and passion into your work. This creates an identifiable voice that will appeal to your customers. People like intimacy and let me tell you, it works!
Don't try to sound professional. It's a blog, okay. Write as if you're speaking to someone very casually, and with a friendly tone. Nothing is worse than a scolding, and angry rant. It might be funny for a little while, but easily and quickly gets old.
Also, clarity = precision. But don't simplify too much: it's insulting.
It'll take time for you to find your voice, and create an appropriate one, but when you DO find it, that's when your blog will get a WOW factor.

Thanks a bunch!

Tomorrow: Tricks to get people to click your ads.

Maximizing Digital Profit - Run a Successful Blog pt.1

Sorry about the late post. I've been about my business today, n'yhear?

Alright, so today's post, along with a few more to come will all be about maximizing your digital profit.

Basically, this post is for newbie bloggers, as well as seasoned veterans who are looking to increase their ad profits. Now, many people try many things to "cheat" the system, and let's be real: it's far more work than required. You want people to visit your site and intentionally click your ads because they are genuinely interested. Integrity, people - let's not forget it.

Running a blog is like running a business. To have a successful business, you need to have a unique product/service that appeals to people, and deliver it with consistency. Consistency, combined with a good product will draw visitors and create visitor loyalty. Thus, we can refer to blog visitors as customers, because you are "selling" them a service, hoping that they click on your ads.

And as we may have experienced, nothing turns off a customer more than coming on too strong. With that said, don't pressure your customer to click your ads! Not only is this bad for business, it's against the rules and conflicts with Google AdSense policy.

Instead, tacitly coerce your customer to click on ads. For example, when you drive to your local fast food chain and order a burger, the clerk will (most of the time) ask you "want fries with that?...do you want to super-size it?"

So, how could you do this with your blog? Well, by having ads relevant to your content. To you newbie bloggers, Google AdSense does an excellent job in posting ads on your site that relates to what you write; independent bloggers, while you may reap more profits, suffer the monotony of screening ads over and over again. I'll run an example by you.

Let's say, you have a passion for footwear. So you write product reviews based on your opinion. Proper writing style could lend credibility that you're quite knowledgable about the subject matter. Your content will attract shoe ads. People who visit your site will likely have the same interest, and a good (but not necessarily thorough) review will bring these customers back. Your customers will see the ads (we'll go into that in more detail later) and feel compelled to click them. Now, advertisers and marketers spend lots of time making attractive ads, so don't worry about people avoiding them.

Now, as your customer base grows. So will your customer loyalty. However, their loyalty is not guarenteed, thus comes the importance of consistency. Picture your blog as a 24-hour business - customers can come anytime of the day. So constantly having fresh material will give you a great edge in maintaining your customer base. Having consistency deters your customers from wandering elsewhere.

With consistency you create a standard, in which posts are posted at a somewhat consistent interval. If you write one post everyday, keep it up, and your readers will understand that you do that. Sometimes, it is good to mix things up a bit, and submit multiple posts, which creates customer intimacy - they are surprised, and their interest level rise.

Now, for all my readers out there who feel a bit discouraged. Don't be. Making money online is not as easy as it is portrayed to be. And 99.9% of the time you will get back what you put into it.
So if you're passionate about your blog, and feel like you have something worthwhile to share, then you will attract traffic.

Also, don't feel discouraged if your traffic levels change. Somedays you'll get alot of customers; somedays you won't. It's alright, but with your consistency, you gain invaluable exposure.

Thanks everybody, and I'm sorry for this later post.

I'm going to open the comment box for anyone who wants to share their advice, and help someone out. No flaming or trolling, please.

Tomorrow: How to increase your traffic levels.
Next day: Tricks to get people to click your ads
Day after: Topical shock value: make people read what you write!


Mr. Stingy

An Unlikely Goldmine - Your Sewage.


I'm no fortune teller, and I can't see the future. But it doesn't take any divination to foresee a demand in waste management. More specifically: water filtration and purification.
The imminent status of our water crisis is often neglected in our post-industrial society. North Americans live in a service-based economy, with an obsession for material goods. We always want MORE, and so far have done an excellent job in hoarding it.

We've all seen what happens when we run out of our goodies:



And this is just oil. Imagine what would happen if a bare necessity was at stake. Like, oh I don't know...WATER?

It's funny because countries with the most abundant sources of fresh water are militarily useless. Like Canada, Iceland, Denmark, and the Scandinavian states. Good game.

People need water. And we're wasting a lot of it. That is, North Americans. To my international audience, you've escaped the blame train. For now!

I'm sorry Americans, but I'm going to use you as an example. Just because it'll please oh so many people.

The annual flow of waste-water in the American Industrial system is 250 trillion pounds. That's just for industrial use. Commercial, domestic and recreational use is off the charts. Literally. It's quite impossible for anyone to track without attaining "Big Brother" status. Which we all would hate, right?

North Americans bathe. Daily. Sometimes multiple times in a single day. On average, we shower for 23 minutes. That's 42.3 gallons. There's really no need for me to cite my sources; how much water we waste is an ugly truth hiding in the (shallow) recesses of our guilty conscience.

We swim. We water our lawns. We wash our cars. We abuse water. And all the while millions of people die everyday due to water-related reasons, such as inadequate water supplies resulting in illness and extreme thirst.

There's no excuse for our behavior. There really is not. We abuse our water supply, and we won't stop. It's too inconvenient to, and North Americans will not sacrifice convenience to save the lives of foreigners living thousands of miles away. That's the truth.

So we try to "mitigate" our problem. We buy low-flow toilets for God's sake!

Fact is: water will always be abused. The only way to deal with a water crisis is to have more water!

Pretty soon, millions of people are going to be jumping on the water-saving bandwagon. Mainly because it looks nice, though. So! Are you ready to take the plunge?

The water supply is at risk. We need more of it. And we always will. Water is more important than oil. We actually need it.

Millions of gallons of fresh drinking water is wasted daily. We'll run out.

But we can recycle water. We can filter it and purify it! There's an intense proliferation of filtering companies, and more than enough places to invest. Put your money there, and let it sit. You won't regret it. The importance of water is constantly being realized, and we can't go on pretending that we don't have a water crisis.

So, to summarize:

People (especially North Americans) love water. We just love to use it. But we're running out of fresh drinking water. So we're going to need more. Due to technology, we're able to "re-use" water and purify it.

The largest demand in the world is for water. There always have been. Now the supply is dipping into dangerous depths, and, wait, can you smell that? MONEY.

Invest in water filtration, folks. You won't regret it.